


Papa Doesn't Smile Anymore

by rotKaiserin



Category: Joker Game (Anime)
Genre: Gen, Shirow Miwa's 1960s Headcanons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-08
Updated: 2018-04-08
Packaged: 2019-04-19 22:22:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14246970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rotKaiserin/pseuds/rotKaiserin
Summary: Long gone was the Papa she'd met, the one who'd taught her love and joy. Emma learned how to cope with this fact.





	Papa Doesn't Smile Anymore

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by [shirow miwa's 1960s d-agency headcanons](http://i-dedicate-this-kill-to-the-fans.tumblr.com/day/2018/01/03), and of tidbits i'd heard of amari getting tortured apparently (i can't read the novels so i can't really confirm this haha, but amari... doesn't look so hot in that pic lol)
> 
> also included a tiny, tiny bit from a previous fic i wrote about amari and emma, _[becoming a family](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9126748)_.
> 
> this is crossposted onto my [writing blog](https://missblanchette.tumblr.com/post/172705542863/papa-doesnt-smile-anymore-11). thank you guys for reading, i hope you all enjoy! ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ

Papa lost his smile years ago. Though, perhaps that was an exaggeration. He still gave a curl of his lips, a small quirk here and there but those were as fake as the aliases he'd taken on. It'd been so long since Emma had last seen the sight of his true smile that sometimes she wasn't sure if she'd been making up the memories, distorting them to reflect the simpler times of years gone by. Then again, things had never really been simple; she'd just been unaware of everything going on. Papa had left for his fateful mission with the promise of a quick return, but the man who'd came back was merely a shell of whom she remembered, having been robbed of his mobility, his vision, and his smile.

Often, Emma wished she could have her Papa back. The one who carried her in his warm arms, that was, not the one she pushed around in his cold wheelchair. She'd hate for such a tragedy to befall anyone, but sometimes she wondered what would've happened if the torture had happened to someone else. If only she had the power to go back in time to stop it, to protect Papa just like he had for her, but there were some things not even a spy could do.

But just as quickly as those thoughts entered her mind, Emma pushed them out. They were disrespectful to her Papa, she thought, to the Papa who lived on in her memories -- the Papa that took her in after her mother left, with the reassuring smile that told her everything would be all right; the Papa that comforted her when all the changes going on overwhelmed her, with the warm smile that lulled the nightmares away; the Papa that taught her to stand tall and live on, with the brilliant smile that gave her a new world.

" _Your Mama would be sad if she saw you frowning like that, wouldn't she?_ " She remembered the words Papa had told her so long ago, so soon after their first meeting. " _So can you smile? Smile for your Mama?_ "

And Emma would smile. This time, for her Papa.

A smile could go a long way, he'd told her; a smile was one's rebellion against the cruelties of the world. She'd learned to smile again despite her losses -- the loss of her father, the loss of her mother, the loss of her old home -- and if she'd managed it before as a child, she could do it again as a woman. The Papa who sat in front of her may be the remains of the Papa filled with love and joy, but she would not falter in front of his blank gazes, his lukewarm touches, nor his empty smiles.

Her smile was probably not as brilliant nor as warm as the one Papa once wore, but that was enough for now. If her Papa could not smile, then Emma would continue smiling for the both of them.

**Author's Note:**

> originally this was supposed to be really sad lol, but somehow i found that a more hopeful ending flowed better and felt more meaningful
> 
> man, i just i really love exploring emma's character, and how she grows as a person as a result of everything that's happened to her. it's certainly not easy, considering everything she's gone through but i imagine she's stronger because of all of it hehe
> 
> anyways, thank you guys again for reading!! feel free to let me know what you think in the comments, or hit me up on [tumblr](http://dollofdeath.tumblr.com) or [twitter](http://twitter.com/nighthawkstars). i hope you all have a wonderful day/night~! ❤⃛ヾ(๑❛ ▿ ◠๑ )


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